Monthly Archives: March 2013

Joy Amidst Suffering

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“How do you maintain a spirit of joy when you have cancer?” Some form of this question was posed to us numerous times to us during my two month stay at Mercy Hospital. The short answer is that our great God has been immensely merciful to us through this unexpected journey. The longer answer  involves a ‘secret’ the world needs to hear: When we allow Jesus to live IN us through faith, all things really ARE possible.

We believe God protected us from leaving too early to Bolivia so that I could be diagnosed and treated. He provided for us by sustaining us with faith that works, giving us real joy in the midst of sorrow.

I’m sure it doesn’t make sense to people who think Christianity should be a ticket out of suffering. The truth is that suffering is part of the human experience. And suffering seems essential to the Christian who wants to identify with Jesus who suffered more than any man. Paul writes, “I want to know Christ–yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, to be like Him in His death.” Sadly, it seems many Christians go through suffering the same way as nonChristians, without hope, without power, and without joy.

I’m not suggesting that suffering is a big party for true believers. There’s no plastic grin on my face. In fact there were some days of chemo treatments and lonely times of recovery that wiped any grin off my face for the moment. Paul also wrestled with suffering writing both “Rejoice in the Lord always,” (Philippians 4:4) and also “I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart” (Romans 9:2). And it was the same man who wrote the secret: “We are sorrowful yet always rejoicing.”

How can you hold suffering and sorrow in one hand while holding joy in the other? Paul answers this in Philippians 3:8. “What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things.”

The ‘secret’ is learning, believing, and acting on this truth: knowing Jesus is better than wealth, comfort, and even health. It is better to have Jesus without these things than to have these things without Jesus. John Piper writes, “Christ is real to us and infinitely precious, more to be desired than any wealth or comfort in this world. Joy doesn’t give way when all else has given way.” Unlike fleeting moments of happiness, true joy sustains us in and through suffering and sorrow…IF knowing Jesus and His sufferings is our greatest desire.

Impossible? With God all things are possible… by faith.

“…and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything. 2 Corinthians 6:9b-10

Transplant Update – 3/19/13

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The University of Iowa has found a ‘perfect match’ for my bone marrow (stem cell) transplant. They are working toward admission on 3/29. This is good news; from the medical viewpoint this is my best chance for survival to two years and beyond. Here are answers to some of the questions posed to us:

What is a stem cell transplant and why do you need it?
The transplant transfers bone marrow stem cells from a healthy donor to a recipient whose body is unable to produce healthy blood cells. The transplant is intended to reduce the risk of a relapse of the cancer.

How do they find a donor?
People under the age of 45 can register at www.BeTheMatch.org to be a marrow donor. DNA is collected using a cotton swab sweep of the mouth and simple blood sample. The HLA tissue type is entered into the computer and made available to transplant centers around the world. Later, a blood sample is taken to do a tissue type match of ten markers (5 each for the donor and recipient). My donor is a 10/10 match.

What does the process involve for the donor?
The donor is given a medicine to increase the number of stem cells released from the bone marrow to the blood stream. In an outpatient procedure lasting 5-7 hours, they will have their blood withdrawn through an IV, processed through a machine to remove the stem cells, and then have their own blood returned to them through another IV.

What is the process for the recipient?
The recipient is admitted to the transplant center a week before the transplant. A regimen of high dose chemotherapy is given to destroy the recipient’s bone marrow and suppress the immune system. Then the donor’s stem cells are infused via IV.

How long do you have to be in the hospital?
The recipient stays in the hospital for 4-5 weeks or up to three months if serious complications arise.

What type of complications might there be?
The donor’s blood cells may attack the recipient’s body or the recipient’s cells may fight the grafted cells. Both problems are common and range from mild to serious even life threatening consequence. Infections are also a significant threat since the immune system is compromised.

Will you be cured after the transplant?
There is no real cure, but generally healthy recipients who survive the transplant have a good chance of living their full lifespan if they can make it to two years without relapse of the cancer.

Thanks for your prayers. We believe God is not done.

Happiness and Joy Walked Into a Cafe

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Happiness and Joy walked into a cafe. Happiness was excited because this was a favorite eating place she hadn’t been to for awhile. Joy was pleased to have this time with Happiness. Happiness was a bit perturbed when her favorite waitress was too busy to say stop and chat. In fact, the server seemed to be in a bad mood. Happiness frowned at her the whole time she took the order. Joy thanked the server for taking the order. Happiness made chit chat with Joy while they waited for their food, commenting rather loudly how rude the server was to her. “She didn’t even ask how I was or about my new sweater!” exclaimed Happiness. Joy listened attentively.

When the server returned with the order, Happiness said, “Well it is about time!” Joy said to the server, “We are going to ask a blessing on our food. Could we pray for you?” The server looked surprised at the offer and answered, “You would do that? I just found out my son has to have surgery. I’m so worried about him and about how we will pay for it!” Happiness felt a little sheepish for not asking the server about her family. Joy held the server’s outstretched hand and said a simple blessing. Turning to their food when the server left, Happiness said, “Can you believe this? The toast is burnt!” Joy said quietly, “I learned the secret of enjoying burnt toast awhile ago.” Joy snapped back, “Enjoy burnt toast? You gotta be kidding!” Proceeding to explain, Joy said, “I read an article about these people who didn’t have enough to eat. In fact, the whole family had less to eat than what I would typically have for a meal all to myself. So I made a promise that for thirty days I would give thanks for whatever I had to eat. The next morning I burnt my breakfast toast. I started to complain to myself but stopped and gave thanks for it, acknowledging that others in the world would be grateful for this morsel of burnt toast.” “How is that thirty day trial going for you?” asked Happiness. “Really well,” replied Joy. “It’s been about ten years now, and even though I don’t intentionally burn my toast it still brings a smile to my face when I do.”

Happiness enjoyed the rest of her meal, despite the burnt toast. When they got ready to leave she left a few coins for a tip. Joy quietly slipped a rather large tip under the plate with a short note of thanks on the receipt.
. . . .
In a world that eagerly seeks happiness, wouldn’t you rather have a little JOY in your life?

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, JOY, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control. Against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23

Love Is A Choice

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Let’s play a game of opposites:
I say, “wet.” You say…..
I say, “night.” You say….
I say, “hot.” You say….

You probably had no problem coming up with the answers: dry, day, and cold, or something similar. But what if I say, “Love.” Would you say the opposite is “hate”. . . or “indifference?”

In all my life I have not found many people who actually hate God. Oh for sure, there are many who are angry or disappointed with God, usually stemming from a deep personal loss or betrayal from people claiming to represent God. Few hate God but many grow cold in their relationship to Him. They don’t feel His love and so they have a hard time loving Him, or even acknowledging Him in their day to day life.

Imagine loving your spouse or child or closest friend without talking with them, enjoying time together, laughing and crying together, even disagreeing. Imagine living with complete indifference toward them. Where is there room for love to grow or even survive?

Not all expressions of love feel like love. A parent’s tough love doesn’t feel like love at the time. A friend offers wise counsel that disagrees with your preferred solution; it doesn’t feel like love.

How do you love when you don’t feel like loving? When the other appears unlovable? When you feel betrayed? When your life is turned upside down? How do you keep on loving when you don’t feel loved back?

Love is much more than feelings. It is not so much something we “fall into” but rather something we continually pursue.

Love is a choice.

The Bible tells us that we can’t escape the love of God. But it also tells us that we can go to a place where we no longer hear His voice. That place is called indifference. And the price of that journey is more than we want to pay.

Jesus sums up all of life in four words:
Love God. Love others.

In business and in life, it is best to live with the end in mind. If love does not define your life now, it won’t define it in the end. What one thing could you do…must you do, to renew loving relationships, with God and with others?

Life is short. Choose love.

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and all your soul and all your mind and all your strength…Love your neighbor as yourself.”
Mark 12:30

Love Never Fails

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We’ve been looking at the famous “love chapter” in First Corinthians. oYou’ve likely heard the words spoken at wedding ceremonies or written on invitations or decorative wall hangings. This excerpt from God’s Word offers practical truth that inspires us to a better life, a life of love.

But these words also might ring hollow or worse, bring pain, if you have ever been hurt by someone who should have loved you instead. Or having been abandoned physically, emotionally, or spiritually, you can’t even ponder the phrase, “love never fails.” Loving someone doesn’t mean they will always love you back or that they will express their love in a way that speaks love to you. And when this is your experience, there are no words to remove the pain you feel.

The old ‘sticks and stones’ nursery rhyme is dead wrong. Words DO hurt. Sometimes they create a lifetime of hurt. But love…love is a choice. You can’t make me stop loving you. Others don’t have the power to make you stop loving life or others, even if they don’t return that love.

It’s called loving unconditionally. It’s the way God loves us. His word says “while we were still sinners, he loved us.” God doesn’t wait until we get our act together. (Let’s give Him thanks for THAT!) He loves us and pursues us even when we don’t pursue Him, even when we have been running FROM Him for a very long time. Even when we feel that even He has abandoned us, His love never fails.

Don’t give up on love. Don’t give up on God. Don’t give up on others. Build new relationships. In the end all our lives are about faith, hope, and love. Pursue great love. Make it your life’s greatest ambition.

First Corinthians 13:8-13
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

The Quality of Love

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First Corinthians 13:4-7
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Think about the people you love. How do they know you love them? Add the word “my” before each statement above. “My love is patient. My love is kind. My love does not envy, my love does not boast and is not proud. My love does not dishonor others, is not self seeking. My love is not easily angered. My love keeps no record of wrongs. My love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth. My love protects, my love always trusts, my love always hopes. My love always perseveres.”

Does it ring true? Don’t beat yourself up if you winced a bit at some of the personalized statements or couldn’t quite muster up courage to speak some out loud. Join the club. We are all a work in progress; it is a life-long journey learning to love well.

Of all the things people might think about when their journey is near its end, love and relationships top the list. Guard some time each day to think about how you will love this day: love God, and love others whose lives you touch. . . While there is still time.

Making Room For Love

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One of the first symptoms of my Leukemia was excruciating back pain that was caused by the cancer cells creating so much pressure in my bone marrow cavity. The cancer cells had moved in and multiplied to the point there just wasn’t room for the healthy cells to grow. The same thing happens in our lives and our ability to love.

Unlovely things take our attention, our time, our energy, and frankly our bank accounts. These activities which have gained prominence in our lives call attention to themselves with a terrible noise like a clanging cymbal so that we cannot help but pay attention to them. And we don’t mind because we so often enjoy these distractions. Maybe there is nothing wrong with these time and energy consumers, but the amount of time and energy they consume is sometimes extraordinary and like cancer, they push out the room needed for love to grow and be expressed.

If you have spent an afternoon learning to use yet another new ‘smart’ phone, or catching up on Facebook, or whittling down the hundreds of emails in your Inbox, you know what I mean. Or maybe it’s idle reading or TV or sports that fills up your time schedule. The question is: “to what extent do these things add value to my life and contribute toward my life goals and those I love? And to what extent do they limit my ability and time to express love, to write an encouraging note, bake some cookies for someone, visit someone?”

It’s never too early or too to late to declutter and do “spring cleaning” of your daily activities. maybe you’ll find time to show others the love God has given you to share. Make room for love to grow in your heart and overflow onto others around you today.

First Corinthians 13:1-3
If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Do you know your blind spots?

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Do you always check your blind spot when shifting lanes in a busy highway? It’s essential for a safe journey!

Cory Stout shared this week about the importance of being aware of the blind spots in our lives. One of the problems with trying to “have it all” is that our focus on getting all we want creates ‘blind spots.’ For example, have you ever noticed how the busyness of ‘making a living’ prevents us from really seeing the suffering of others? This week alone, Christians in Iran were jailed simply for praying in their own home. Children in Syria are orphaned in a war torn country. Every minute, children die of hunger throughout much of the world and millions eek out an existence without access to clean water. Even in your own neighborhood, people are lonely, tired, sick, needing encouragement.

Sometimes blind spots in my life keep me from seeing opportunities God gives me to relate with others. When this happens, others miss out and I miss out too because blessings always travel two way streets.

One blind spot in my life is keeping too busy. Doing lots of things, even good things, sometimes blinds us from doing the one right thing for the moment. It also robs us of the opportunity to do nothing for a moment and practice the art of human BEing.

Another blind spot that I have to watch out for is selfishness, the allurement of wrapping my life around me. Yes, we need time to ourselves to think, process, and relax. But when this becomes the filter through which we view much of life it creates a blind spot that prevents us from seeing others around us and from seeing God at work in our lives.

Another blind spot is the idea that I can’t really do much to help a situation. The war in Syria, gang rapes in India, world poverty and hunger. . . what can I do? I can do one thing. I can spend less at the vending machine and easily sponsor a child through Compassion International. (www.compassion.com) I can commit time to pray specifically for one or more of these situations every day. I could reduce my own water bill by cutting waste and send a monthly donation to World Vision (www.worldvision.org) to bring safe drinking water to others around the world or save one girl from a life of exploitation.

Blind spots don’t have to blind us. They can be opportunities for living a more fulfilling life…of really having it all. What one thing could you do each day or each week to check the blind spots in your life?

Can We Have It All?

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“You can have it all.” Wherever you turn, this proclamation confronts you, either as a direct quote or an implied fact: whatever you want, you can have it. After all, we live in the land and time of opportunity, right?

Often in our struggle to ‘have it all’ the focus turns to work-life ‘balance’. Questions like, “How can I succeed and advance at work while balancing my responsibilities to family?” It seems we approach life balance as if it were an acrobatic act. How many things can I juggle without dropping one? Have you ever felt that way? Maybe that’s where you are now, trying to balance:
Career, marriage, children
Money, home, hobbies
Facebook friends, family, future dreams
Ministry, personal goals, family
(Can I have a slice of God and a side of purposeful living with that?)

One of the problems with ‘balancing’ life is that it is not easily separated into categories that give themselves well to compartments. If you have ever carried family struggles to work or work problems home, you know what I mean. Author Myron Rush said it well in Lord of The Marketplace. We don’t have a secular life and a sacred life. We have just one life to live. It is not either quality or quantity of time and effort. It is “both-and.” One life is lived with one purpose.

This life is not so much balanced as it is blended.

If there were a recipe for a well-lived life it certainly would not keep all the ingredients separated in their own containers. Instead, all the ingredients must be blended together in proportion with one another. If we approach life in this manner, it seems we can have it all. You can eat your cake and have it too. At least to the extent that we live each day with ‘all’ our being, all that God has created us to be. If God has the very best plan for us, then bringing all our desires and ambitions in alignment with His seems to be the key to ‘having it all.’

What does ‘having it all’ mean to you? What would it look like to stop balancing life and start blending it? Add your comment to benefit other readers in the Go Light Your World community!

“You will seek me and you will find me when you seek me with all your heart.” – God. (Jeremiah 29:13)