Have you been in a very dark place in your life? Have you known God’s Word of redemption and restoration to be true, but at the same time felt his sustaining grace is not as sufficient as it should be, his strength not so powerful in your weak state? His promise to never abandon you sometimes seem to elude you?
Over the course of this uncertain and unexpected journey through cancer and repeated infections, I’ve written quite a bit about suffering and the God’s power to overcome our painful circumstances. I’ve also tried to be transparent along the way. I have strong faith, thanks to God for that gift and the wisdom to exercise it in times of good and plenty. But strong faith doesn’t make the trials go away. It didn’t reduce the heat of the refining fire in whose furnace I find myself. Some of you have been in that place and know this to be true.
Faith hasn’t always calmed the storm around me, and I’m not always persuaded that it calms me in the midst of every storm. And yet, day by day I press on, because God’s grace is indeed sufficient even when it doesn’t feel that way. His strength is magnified in my weakness because I am left with no recourse but to depend on the one who has always been and will always been my refuge, my fortress, my God in whim I trust. (Psalm 91:2) Where else could I turn but to my loving God?
Faith makes all things possible, not easy. Thanks be to God for the measure of faith he gives and the amazing grace he pours over us!
I don’t know any “Super Christians” who are “Faster than a speeding bullet! More powerful than a locomotive! Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound!” No one who is invincible to pain and sorrow. Do you? The sorrows and challenges of life don’t stop at the Christian’s door. They march right in without invitation and cause havoc and destruction wherever they settle.
What does empower me to press on is not “Why?” or “How long?” but “How?” The answer to this vital question is found in God’s Word. “How will you have me respond to this difficult challenge?” And he answers, “With my help.”
When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. – Isaiah 43:2
His presence which I’ve so often ignored in my pursuit of self is the peace I need in the chaos of pain. His grace is sufficient for my needs, if not always my wants. HIs strength helps me persevere when I am too weak to carry on in my own power. He carries me even when I am not aware of being in his arms. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside still waters. He refreshes my soul.
It’s natural to want to avoid and escape pain, but I’m learning that sometimes I shouldn’t be so quick to pray it away. I’ve discovered some of the very richest blessings in my darkest moments, knowing for sure I am not alone, knowing my hope in God is secure.
We can’t escape pain; it demands our attention. But we don’t have to focus exclusively on it. I’ve found that doing so is to my peril. I can’t let my circumstances define who I am. Only when I turn my eyes off the pain and onto Jesus do I find relief. Where is your determined focus?
If you are in a dark place, tell him if you’re angry or disappointed. Let him know if you feel abandoned. This is how David prayed, and God called him “A man after my own heart.” Because David remained faithful, the most essential life measure, and ended his prayers with “And yet still I will praise you and trust in you, my God.”
Be real with God and continue to draw near, clinging to the hope of your faith in his sustaining grace and good plan for you – even in the midst of your storm.