“Pain insists on being attended to.” (CS Lewis) Sometimes there is a fine line between giving attention to our pain and dwelling on it. Then again, there are some ‘seasons’ of pain when pain is so great that it cannot be escaped.

The last few days have been like that. Between painful swallowing, lower GI tract problems, fevers, and unresolved headaches (I know, I just had written how they had decreased!), it has been hard to focus on much else. Having received my last dose of chemo yesterday, I hope to be on the upswing soon. In the meantime, they put me on a Dilaudid IV drip (morphine’s stronger cousin). The problem with with some of our ‘treatments’ is that sometimes they create more problems, in this case extreme fatigue and sleepiness, nausea, and constant itching. So I’ve notched that dose down to balance a little relief with more ability to concentrate and less side effects. (I’m glad I had a number of posts written and scheduled in advance for this very purpose.)

It’s hard to choose a positive path in the midst of intense struggles, whether they be physical, financial, relational, or spiritual. But we need to decide whether we serve a GREAT God or not, and ask Him for His strength to respond accordingly.

The human brain cannot focus instantly on two opposites at the same time. It cannot dwell on the anxiety of pain and also, at the same time, focus on praising God for His goodness. The body may remain in pain, but the disciplined mind can choose how it will focus its attention…a lesson I am still learning.

“If we can only keep our grip on the sure thing we started out with, we’re in this with Christ for the long haul.” Hebrews 3:14 (The Message)