Tag Archives: Perspective

I see it differently now

In the Canadian Murdoch Mysteries, young detective Murdoch solves murder mysteries by using his keen interest in science and also relying on his devout faith in God. His success as an investigator almost always involves applying what he already knows to a situation that is new. For example, in one episode he needed a photograph of the victim right away but the only known photograph of the lady was in France. The fax machine had not yet been invented and it would take weeks to send the photo by boat. However, he knew that electronic communication was possible by converting a series of numbers into letters: 1=a, 2=b, etc. Looking at that in a different way, he realized those numbers could represent not just letters but also shades of gray. So by constructing a rubric where 1=white, 9=black, and the numbers in between representing the various shades, he had the photograph in France converted to a chart of numbers and had this sent electronically by wire. Once received in Toronto, the numbers were painstakingly conveyed back into the grayscale correspondents. The result was of course a facsimile of the original photograph.

Isn’t this how all inventions are given birth? A problem presents itself, like a deep chasm separating a person on one side from someone on the other side. Always seeing the expansive gap between them, the only solution to come together was to walk for miles, through great effort, to find a possible crossing. And so it always was this way – until someone looked at the problem differently and built a bridge to cross the gap.

I don’t know if you are particularly inventive or engineering-minded when it comes to creating new solutions to nagging problems. But don’t we all have the ability to look at a problem from a different angle, a new light, and build a bridge of our own to cross the gap from frustration and woe to victory and celebration? That’s exactly what happens when we encourage each other to see problems as opportunities, stumbling blocks as stepping-stones, and even a wide gap of understanding of disagreement as the opportunity to construct a bridge built with respect, compassion, forgiveness, humility, and genuine love.

Right now you see someone who hurts others with brazen words and actions. But looking differently at them, you see someone who is hurt themselves and needing someone to befriend them. You’re in a heated discussion where no consensus can be found and you just want to escape. Looking differently, you realize that HOW we make a decision is sometimes more important than the actual decision. You think of someone who disagrees vehemently with your political or spiritual views and quickly a wide gulf appears to prevent even a civil conversation from happening. Looking differently, you see your own views, firm as they may be, are not the only way of seeing things. Respecting the other person’s right to their own opinion changes how we see them.

That’s what God’s Word does. It shines light, the great symbol of truth and understanding and wisdom onto dark and problematic situations. God gives us the perspective we need to have hundreds of times a day in order to see our problems, our life, and others through his eyes.

Confounded by seeing the your problems always the same and never-changing? Read God’s Word and ask him to see things differently – though his eyes.

The danger of becoming disengaged

 

As a lad, I enjoyed playing with trains. Each car and engine were coupled together and each train performed according to its purpose. My passenger trains delivered imaginary people to their town and country destinations and the freight trains delivered needed goods to various industries along the track. As engineer my job was to ‘couple’ the cars to their engines, keep the tracks clear, and make sure the engines didn’t go too fast around the curves.

 

Sometimes I’d ‘uncouple’ the cars from their engines and park them along the sidetrack. Sometimes the cars become disengaged on their own, particularly when they hit a rough spot in the tracks. Disengagement always resulted in one of two things: inactivity, or worse, a derailment.

 

We all experience some level of disengagement in our lives. Our mind wanders when we intend it to stay focused. Work becomes tedious or boring. Relationships meant to be at the center of our lives become side tracked in the pursuit of other activities. Goals and projects get set aside, sometimes for months and years, as we find it difficult to remain engaged with them.

 

Sometimes we purposefully disengage to gain perspective and “recharge our batteries.” In order to solve a problem it’s often beneficial to disengage for a moment, step back, and look at the bigger picture. Vacations, reading a book, or a walk through the garden perform a similar rejuvenating purpose. These types of disengagement are helpful because they are both temporary and purposefully intended to help us get back on track with renewed energy and perspective.

 

But there is a danger of disengaging when it leads to becoming sidetracked for periods of time. We are meant to be connected – with life, with each other, and with God. The longer we are disengaged, the more we are likely to forget our original purpose. When we lose interest or allow ourselves to become burned out, we start to feel it would be better to just step aside or go through the motions of being connected when we really aren’t fully engaged.

 

We could blame others, saying “If only my job were more interesting.” “If only my spouse were more understanding.” “If only my church were more relevant.” A recent study by the Pew Research Center reveals a growing number of millennials disengaging from the church and even their faith, leading one observer to conclude, “Older generations of Americans are not passing along the Christian faith as effectively as their forebears.” And it’s true, isn’t it? Aren’t we responsible to pass on knowledge, skills and even our faith to others, especially to our children?

 

And yet, we all contribute to our own disengagement. We each are responsible for staying coupled with our faith and life purpose. It’s our responsibility to fight boredom and distraction, our distinct calling to avoid identifying ourselves with the world when our true identity is found in our relationship with God.

 

Disengaging from our life activities and relationships is not just like getting side tracked by wandering thoughts during a long speech. Prolonged disengagement has the tendency to derail our lives causing tragic losses. One of the surest ways of losing a job, a marriage, a friendship, or your faith, is to begin sentences with the words, “I hate.”

 

When we couple our activities and relationships to our negative feelings and thoughts, they always take us farther down the track than we want to go and to a place we didn’t intend to visit…usually a dead-end side track.

 

If you find yourself side tracked from your real purpose in life or if you discover you’re being pulled down the wrong track by negative thoughts and emotions, maybe it’s time to switch engines. Couple yourself with God’s Word and the hope He offers. Find ways to connect with God frequently throughout your daily activities. Set your mind on your desired destination and stay on track.

 

I See The Mailbox

I recall the story of the husband and wife who were backing out of their driveway to go somewhere. The husband was driving with his loving wife in the passenger seat. Seeing the car get closer and closer to their mailbox at the end of the drive, the dialog went something like this:
Wife: Honey, watch out for the mailbox.
Husband: Yes, I see it.
Wife (as the car gets closer still to the mailbox): Watch out for the mailbox!
Husband: I SEE the mailbox!
Wife (as they get closer yet): you’re going to hit the mailbox!
Husband: Don’t worry, I see the ….
(Agonizing scraping sound of metal against metal, and mailbox falling to the ground)

We can imagine and laugh at the conversation that might have followed. But we’ve all been there, right? We are certain that we have the perspective on something while the other person maintains THEY are the ones to ‘see clearly.’ How embarrassing it is when the ‘mailbox’ goes down because of US.

Marcia and I have used this story when counseling young couples, reminding them that sometimes it is helpful to have a code phrase to bring clarity to a discussion. Whether in the home or at work, “I see the mailbox,” may be a good phrase to use to remind us that our vision, however clear it seems to us, may not be the only perspective on the situation.

“Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.”
Ephesians 5:21

Living Beyond Circumstance

In our daily walks through the two hospital units, it is evident that everyone here has an important and often tough job. The needs of many patients are very intense. Some days are just busy while others are crazy-chaotic. You can see it on the faces of the caring workers, even through veiled smiles.

As we interact with the staff, we notice that none are immune to the pressures of caring for others, learning a new documentation system, and just coping with life. But even with this commonality, there IS a noticeable difference:

Some people make their day; for others, the day makes them.

Life happens TO some people and determines how their day goes, like a boat being tossed from wave to wave. Others view life through a different lens, one that sees circumstance as ever-changing, but without the power to sink their ship. An inner truth, not circumstance, guides their response to life.

This is not some sort of “master of my own fate” concept. Personally, it seems that such control is illusionary at best. Rather, it is being fully-persuaded that God’s purpose and power supersedes the ‘stuff’ life throws us; it is the discovery that there is reason to give thanks IN (if not for) all circumstances. None of us become perfect masters of our daily perspective. (That is why we need each other!) But when we discipline ourselves to pursue truth and grace and let those be our guide, then mere circumstance loses its power over us.

What controls your life?

“Give thanks in all circumstances for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:18